The Wicker Man (2006)

"Any provocative questions LaBute might have wanted to raise are totally obscured as the rising tide of absurdity gradually overwhelms the entire enterprise..."

"A movie like this can survive an absurd premise but not incompetent execution. And Mr. LaBute, never much of an artist with the camera, proves almost comically inept as a horror-movie technician...It's neither haunting nor amusing; just boring..."

"Unlikely to inspire a passionate following similar to the original, the film, which opened Friday without being screened for the press, ultimately induces more titters than dread..."

"Despite its logy, red-herring structure, the film has enough enigma and weirdness that it gradually stirs to life..."

""Something bad is about to happen - I can feel it!" mutters Malus. He can say that again. From the heavy-handed nods to the infinitely superior original (Edward's ex-fiancée is called Willow Woodward, for example) to the comical lack of menace or peril, this Wicker Man is a calamity from start to finish..."